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Stephen Michael McMenamin
September 12, 1955 ~ November 20, 2019
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I am a Chi Phi brother of Steve. I met Steve around 1972 when he was a freshman at Cornell and was pledging Chi Phi. Back then and probably now there were two choices for living at Cornell after the first year, off campus and fraternities. I was a year ahead so I was an upperclassman for all the zany , and harmless, antics of pledging and being initiated into Chi Phi for Steve. Very quickly I learned that outsmarting Steve was impossible, nor was it possible to wear out his incredible mind. He was always a step ahead. One night Bruce Rosen and I showed up at his dorm to take him on a blindfolded ride into the countryside to leave him to find his way back alone in the dark, not knowing where he was. We drove him all around while he entertained us with his wit and slowly convinced us that he knew damn well we weren’t really going to leave him . We finally gave up and drove back to the frat for a beer. On initiation night, we were making him memorize all sorts of stupid stuff ( I can to this day recite “ Home, Home On the Range� backwards.) Perhaps Steve could also. I started trying to mess with him over Sherlock Holmes mysteries and quickly learned he had read everything by Arthur Conan Doyle. He sailed through initiation without breaking a sweat.
I remember Steve’s smile, his way of bobbing up and down, always looking around, alert for life around him. He was a good friend and brother and I am sorry it took so many years to re-connect with him.
He and I are connected in another uncommon way. He was an organ recipient, given the gift of 30 years more life, by someone perhaps unknown to him. Our son Jeffrey died 11 years ago and was an organ donor. Jeff saved 6 lives and those lives are a gift to our family, as well as the recipients’ families. We sometimes think of his heart and how that recipient is using his or her new gift of life.
It sounds like Steve did a good job living his second life, being a good steward for another’s heart, while honoring that
I keep trying to come up with a specific story that embodies the extraordinary man Steve was. And I instead I come back to a zillion “little things” that are ultimately really big things because of the tremendous impact he had on so many every single day. He was wicked smart and very accomplished of course. And yet what I will remember most are the little known but witty movie quotes that spawned many conversations about human nature, his love of well done music, his ability to turn everyday human stories and behaviors into learning moments, his sherpa-like ability to guide each person to something better for them, more amazing meals than I can count (and how he embraced my “slow eating” idea for our trips one year) … his humor, his relentless optimism, his genuine caring and joy of life and the people he loved …
He used those 28+ years of his second life so much better than most of us ever could’ve. I feel so blessed to have journeyed a ways in life alongside Steve. He told me early in November that he was going to ride his body until the wheels fell off. I’m imagining Steve jumping on and riding an eternal Soul Train now because he’d never let a journey end if he didn’t have a new one to start. He’ll never leave my heart.I wish you all love and I hope you find peace in sharing your memories of Steve with each other.
I met Steve in 1977 at Cornell, great guy, smart as a whip and funny too! So sorry for your loss, to young from my perspective. Tim O’Connor- Chi Phi brother
I met Steve in the Fall of 1972 as we were both freshmen at Cornell and on the rowing team together. We later became fraternity brothers, where for the next four years we were together. My graduate year Steve and I rented a house out on Lake Cayuga. Steve had to be the most brilliant programmer I ever came across. I learned a lot from him. After college we seemed to go our separate ways but stayed in touch via email and LinkedIn. I’m sorry we didn’t get a chance to connect in person in the later years. There has always been that bond that fraternity brothers have. I will miss you Steve Mac. My sincere condolences to Steve’s extended family for your loss.
Rick Spratt – Chi Phi Brother
I reported to Steve at Borland in the 2006-2007 time frame. He was a great leader. I know it’s hard to believe, but I keep his book “Essential Systems Analysis” on the nightstand next to my bed. That book has always been a favorite. May his memory be eternal.
I was a year ahead of Steve in college, and a fraternity brother. He had a very intimidating intellect, but he was so unassuming and down to earth he never flaunted it. Instead, Steve always brought his wonderful infectious smile, and warmth to any gathering. I was very lucky to have spent time with him!!!
My condolences to Steve’s family and friends. I had the privilege to work with Steve at Borland back in 2006 – 2007. My son was born during this time and we learned would need a heart transplant to live.
Talking to Steve one day about my son needing a heart transplant and expressing my concerns about the future, Steve says so matter of factly “It beats the alternative.” Steve proceeded to tell me about his transplant.
I didn’t even know he had a transplant – and perhaps that is the whole point. I had been on a trip to England with Steve and several other Borland colleagues to meet with a customer some months prior. Enjoying meals and conversations and would have never known the challenges he had faced.
I often think of Steve and other brave individual like Steve who contributed to the knowledge in the medical community that made it possible to give my now 13 year old son his 2nd life.
Rest in peace Steve.
Steve and I worked together from 2007-2009. I was his HR partner – not always a “welcomeâ€� relationship with some leaders. From day 1 Steve treated me with such respect. Within just a few weeks of me being on the job, he called about an issue with someone on his team. Those conversations are never easy. What struck me immediately about Steve was his compassion. He was one of those unique individuals who perfectly balanced his role as a leader with being a kind human being.
He patiently taught me about the business, and helped me better understand how engineers think. I think we learned a lot from each other, largely because of his curious mindset.
Sending all of Steve’s family my thoughts and prayers. He will be missed by many.
We will miss you Steve. Godspeed.